LOVE AND LUST

"Love" is a state of being. It is often considered an emotion and a feeling. But it is much more than that. True love IS! If you love, you love everyone and everything. True love is not directional. It is not directed towards one person. What one feels towards a particular person is attachment, attraction, sexual desire, etc. There could be love also. The confusion is due to the generally and loosely used term. People say they “love” a food, or a person or a song. What they really mean is that they really like that thing very much. They take great pleasure in the food or greatly enjoy the company of the person and greatly enjoy the song, etc.

 True love is a wholly and completely positive state of being. In true love there is no negativity like longing or the desire to possess or despair or sadness or sleeplessness or any of the other such emotions that associated with the commonly used and understood term.
This is the reason that there is so much unhappiness everywhere. There is much hype created about love. We are led to believe that no life is complete without experiencing true love. Love is the greatest feeling. etc. etc. All this is true. 

The problem is that the definition or the perception of what true love is has been distorted to such an extent that people think the attraction they feel towards a person is love. One cannot fall in love. But people believe that it happens. As a result they keep falling in love and then fall out of love also as much and as often. There's no such thing as love at first sight. That's merely attraction, lust, sexual desire, etc. True love begins when this phase of a relationship ends. The initial stage (the duration of this stage varies from person to person and relationship to relationship) in a relationship is what is often termed as the rosy, honeymoon, rollercoaster period. 

The desire for one another, the overactive hormones, creates a feeling of euphoria where everything is rosy and pink. The partners in the relationship can see no flaws in each other. They laugh, they have fun, they have fun doing things together, they make "love" all the time, etc. etc. But once that period ends then the reality sets in and the flaws start becoming noticeable. The different personalities start clashing. And problems begin and eventually there's clashes and eventually separation. Then each of the two ex-partners starts looking for another person to recreate that euphoria with.

 
But if the two people can stay together after the honeymoon period is over that is when true love starts. If they want to stay with each other after they are no longer so strongly sexually attracted to each other. If they can create a harmony of understanding each other inspite of having different personalities, that is the beginning of love. If they want to live with each other inspite of the glaring flaws that are noticeable in each other now, that's the beginning of love.

As I said before, Love is a purely positive state. It gives you strength. It gives you courage. It gives you a more positive outlook to life. It empowers you. It encourages you. It helps you grow as a person. It sets you free. It gives you confidence. It brings out your creativity. I could go on and on about the positive aspects but I think you must have gotten the picture by now. And there is no negative emotion at all, ever! And it radiates from you encompassing one and all around you!

LUST

• You’re totally focused on a person’s looks and body.

• You’re interested in having sex, but not in having conversations.
• You’d rather keep the relationship on a fantasy level, not discuss real feelings.
• You want to leave soon after sex rather than cuddling or breakfast the next morning.
• You are lovers, but not friends.
• If distance comes between you and him/her, you become impatient and persistent on ending things.
• You do not plan your future with them and are not serious about where your relationship is going.

LOVE

• Meeting or talking to them all day and night is not on your list anymore.

• You want to spend quality time together other than sex.

• You get lost in conversations and forget about the hours passing.
• You want to honestly listen to each other’s feelings, make each other happy.
• He or she motivates you to be a better person.
• You want to get to meet his or her family and friends.
• You can stand the distance test as and when necessary no matter how long it is.
• You want to do everything with that person, be it traveling, working, eating, sleeping, enjoying.
• You want to grow old with them.